Funeral services and related activities help the grieving family and friends. To many, losing a loved one seems to be the most intense negative feeling they could ever experience in life. For more information about Funeral click here Gentry Griffey.
Therefore, this feeling of grief has to be dealt with properly because healing takes time and the process may differ from one person to another. In addition, it is also often affected by the manner and timing of the death of the loved one.
Stages of Feelings.
The funeral paves the way for dealing with the stages of feelings the bereaved friends and family would feel. When death comes, especially when it is sudden or if it is violent, several feelings are involved. The first feeling would be anger; followed by regret; and then there is the feeling of permanent loss or grief.
The manner of death of a loved one may cause feelings of anger on the part of mourning family members and friends. This is often experienced when the death is unexpected, violent, and untimely. Usually, death is unexpected. But, there are also cases when a person has been sick for a long time, has a terminal disease, or is already very old. Though the time of death is foreseen, anger may still arise from the feeling of helplessness.
On the other hand, sudden deaths such as accidents and acts of violence usually result in anger due to feelings of getting even or seeking justice. Instead of immediately accepting the death of a loved one, the bereaved may resort to other actions to cope with the pain. The search for justice may even prolong the agony. If and when justice is achieved, they still have to deal with the feeling of grief.
Another strong feeling that is aroused is regret. This is also a consequence of the feeling of helplessness and inability to save or even be in the presence of the dead when death occurred. If not shared, regret can hinder the healing process.
Acceptance of Reality. When the feelings have been identified and shared, there is a greater chance of accepting the reality of death. The funeral serves an important purpose in facing the death of a loved one. When family and friends gather together to celebrate the life of the departed, mourning becomes a normal happening and the burden of losing someone is shared.
The process of trying to face the reality of not being together with the departed loved one or not being able to physically touch him would start at this point. This is the start of the healing process. Other people tend to deny the reality and pretend that the loved one is only on a long trip abroad. This coping mechanism will only delay the process of healing and may even affect their relationship with others as well as affect their view of life.
Honoring the Dead. It is during the funeral that the dead is usually honored by tributes and by the manner of burial he receives. Some cultures believe that the dead will not rest in peace if they are not given proper burial. Therefore, honoring the dead in the midst of friends and family members will surely bring comfort and assurance to the ones concerned.
The giving of tributes or eulogy must be done in proper order and manner. Feelings must be respected. A few words and some gestures of sympathy are preferred than lengthy praises and “what ifs.” Flowers and caskets or urns must be carefully chosen to suit the dead’s life and preferences. While eulogies and other funeral tasks usually involve the ones closest to the departed, other details such as flower arrangements, food and refreshments, and physical set up can be handled by the funeral services staff.
Moving on. The funeral service is a time when grieving family and friends are comforted and are led to move on and physically let go of the departed. Again, it is only the first step to the many stages of finally moving on in life without the person who passed away.
Meanwhile, help does not end in burial. The grieving family and friends must be reassured once in a while that they are not alone. Counseling and visits are important factors to ease grief. Other forms of memorials are already available these days in the form of social media and other online applications.
Grief takes time to heal. Grief diminishes when you realize that your relationship with your family and intimate friends does not end in death. There will always be memories to look back to and, to some, there is that hope of meeting again in the future.
Whatever your belief is, it is always helpful to have the proper ushering of the dead to their final resting place and a special time to let go of them physically through memorial services and activities. This in itself brings healing and comfort to the ones who are left behind.